I am still really having a hard time with eating. Many times I go to the refrigerator, cannot find anything to eat, so I eat nothing. I am still under 1000 calories daily.
The diet I am on is very restrictive in the sense that I don't know how to cook vegetables that I will actually eat and also that I have to plan every calorie (kind of like Weight Watchers was). I can have 2 servings of protein, 1 serving of legumes, etc., and my head feels like exploding. I took some time to adapt what our family normally eats to this diet, and I would have like one meal a day if I ate what my family does. Just the build-a-nacho that we eat is 2 protein, 1 legume and 1 vegetable. Well that leaves me with just 1 serving of grain and nuts, 2 fruit and then 4 servings of oil along with the medical stuff I take and UNLIMITED VEGETABLES, which I have no knowledge of, nor enjoy by themselves; I always eat vegetables with protein. Chicken salad is 2 protein, 1 nut and 4 oil, which leaves me with a legume, 2 fruit and a grain for the rest of the day. Most recipes have things that I am not supposed to eat; I will probably eat a lot of pickles and drink tons of tomato juice (both vegetables). "My doctor could help me" you say? He says that he has never come across someone who has trouble eating, that his patients are creative and find ways to make food for themselves; no help there.
My weight is stable but not moving at 299.6 this morning... measurements from Saturday were 39.5 (-3.5 total), 44 (-1.5 total) and 60.75 (-3.25 total). I am supposed to lose some weight in this six weeks, but after two, not happening.
I have to get into an exercise routine. When school starts (22 August) it will be fine, but now I am always having to exercise in the afternoon in the blazing sun. It is pretty horrible, and because of that, I am not exercising regularly. The next round of shots starts on 15 August, so I will be back on the 500 calorie diet when my exercise routine straightens out.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Monday, July 18, 2011
HCG - Stabilization Diet Day 7
It has been a really rough week. I have no idea what to eat. I am trolling for suggestions on how to cook vegetables that I would be willing to eat. It seems that from tracking my food, I have no problem eating protein (a throwback from my surgery, since gastric bypass patients need to eat a lot of protein), I average about30-50g of fat, 10-20g of fiber and 35-55 carbs. I have this fiber stuff I sprinkle into my food because I am not eating enough vegetables if I am home (have no problem eating veggies if they are cooked for me).
As of when I got out of bed today (I was late), I was 298.8 pounds....
I did mention yesterday on my Facebook that I am starting to exercise again... I did two miles, but averaged a 26-minute mile... ack! I was up to a 19-minute mile before I did the diet....
As of when I got out of bed today (I was late), I was 298.8 pounds....
I did mention yesterday on my Facebook that I am starting to exercise again... I did two miles, but averaged a 26-minute mile... ack! I was up to a 19-minute mile before I did the diet....
Thursday, July 14, 2011
HCG - Stabilization Diet Day 4
Finally, I broke the 300 pound barrier! As of this morning I am 299.8, and hoping for a little more tomorrow. I needed to pass that mark.
I am afraid to eat. It's crazy but it's true. This happened to me when I was bulimic too; I figure if I don't eat, I won't gain. I know in my head that yes I will lose weight, but I will make myself sick, but emotions don't care much for logic.
I talked to a friend at church who is thin because of this diet, and she reminded me that in the original protocol, after the injections you are supposed to increase calories but avoid carbs and sugar for three weeks of the six week break. I bought the Metagenics stuff only to find that it has 17 net carbs and 16 sugar per serving, so I don't want to use it. I use SparkPeople to track what I eat, and even with trying to avoid carbs, I have eaten between 30-40 carbs per day; with the medical stuff, that would double. The caloric intake has gotten a little better - I ate 776 calories yesterday (as opposed to 526 Tuesday and 646 Monday). I am trying to figure out what to eat that is compatible with me, and it is a very tough decision-making process.
I am afraid to eat. It's crazy but it's true. This happened to me when I was bulimic too; I figure if I don't eat, I won't gain. I know in my head that yes I will lose weight, but I will make myself sick, but emotions don't care much for logic.
I talked to a friend at church who is thin because of this diet, and she reminded me that in the original protocol, after the injections you are supposed to increase calories but avoid carbs and sugar for three weeks of the six week break. I bought the Metagenics stuff only to find that it has 17 net carbs and 16 sugar per serving, so I don't want to use it. I use SparkPeople to track what I eat, and even with trying to avoid carbs, I have eaten between 30-40 carbs per day; with the medical stuff, that would double. The caloric intake has gotten a little better - I ate 776 calories yesterday (as opposed to 526 Tuesday and 646 Monday). I am trying to figure out what to eat that is compatible with me, and it is a very tough decision-making process.
Monday, July 11, 2011
HCG - Stabilization Diet Day 1
Well, I did not make my goal... I was 300.8 this morning. My measurements were (on Sunday) 39.75 (-3.25 total), 44 (-1.5 total) and 61.25 (-2.75 total). Not too bad, but I so wanted to say I was 200-and-something.
I am very baffled about what to do for a diet at this point. I bought the medical food stuff, but after talking to a friend about the diet, she reminded me that the original protocol says to stabilize over three weeks, which means that I need to have no carbs or sugar for the first three weeks. I have decided to take out the carbs and sugar, but increase calories to the lower 1,300 mark instead of the 1,600 the doctor wanted. It also gives me wiggle room.
Still struggling with what to eat... so far I have had only "the soy milk taste-testing", some almonds and 4oz. of turkey breast... need to go shopping...
I am very baffled about what to do for a diet at this point. I bought the medical food stuff, but after talking to a friend about the diet, she reminded me that the original protocol says to stabilize over three weeks, which means that I need to have no carbs or sugar for the first three weeks. I have decided to take out the carbs and sugar, but increase calories to the lower 1,300 mark instead of the 1,600 the doctor wanted. It also gives me wiggle room.
Still struggling with what to eat... so far I have had only "the soy milk taste-testing", some almonds and 4oz. of turkey breast... need to go shopping...
Saturday, July 9, 2011
HCG 43
My last shot was on Thursday (forgot to take the shot once), and this three days of being on the diet without the shot has been difficult. I have been really hungry and really depressed.
It turns out that I have my period again, so that is three periods during this forty-three days. It has wreaked havoc on my weight. I was down to 300.6, but bounced up to 301.8 and it has been that way for three days. I thought for sure I would reach my goal, to be under 300 pounds, but it is now iffy. Tomorrow is the last day of the five hundred-calorie diet, so I have until Monday morning to reach two hundred-and-something.
I will weigh and tape myself tomorrow and add it to this... forgot to tape, as I had to bounce out of bed and take off early.
I have many concerns about the "diet between the diet" phase of this. Number one, I have to work in some of the food that I have passed up; there is no way I could be on a perpetual diet for the next... let me guesstimate how long it will take... another five rounds or so of this.... that would be about another 380 days from now... a little over a year. As I have mentioned many times, "normal" is my goal, and to abstain from things that normal people eat for a year and a quarter is not normal; it has already caused a lot of anxiety, and it should not have to.
I am also concerned about the complexity of the diet, and the need for "medical food", which is really expensive. I will literally have to construct what I can and cannot eat every day. I have been using SparkPeople to figure out how to manage this complicated diet.
Another thing is that you cannot throw out your kitchen and suddenly eat the way you diet; the diet needs to fit how you already eat or else you will not follow it. I have grouped foods that our family normally eats, and have been fitting meals into the diet. Build-A-Nacho is very popular around our house, but it takes up over three quarters of my day's allowances, so I will have to mostly starve to have it.
If you are considering doing this, be prepared to spend a lot of money on stuff you need. You need over three pounds of protein a week, vegetables and fruits, which are also expensive, the no-calorie salad dressing that has saved my life is $5.00 for two to three days perhaps, and I should buy stock in Traditional Medicinals because I drink their tea (because I hate water), and that is a ton of money too. I have been very weak, so I have also spent easily over $100.00 on B-12, stuff for constipation, stuff to give me more energy, stuff to help my adrenals, etc. I feel very guilty when I see my husband eating spaghetti every day and my kids eating sandwiches every day to fund this.
It turns out that I have my period again, so that is three periods during this forty-three days. It has wreaked havoc on my weight. I was down to 300.6, but bounced up to 301.8 and it has been that way for three days. I thought for sure I would reach my goal, to be under 300 pounds, but it is now iffy. Tomorrow is the last day of the five hundred-calorie diet, so I have until Monday morning to reach two hundred-and-something.
I will weigh and tape myself tomorrow and add it to this... forgot to tape, as I had to bounce out of bed and take off early.
I have many concerns about the "diet between the diet" phase of this. Number one, I have to work in some of the food that I have passed up; there is no way I could be on a perpetual diet for the next... let me guesstimate how long it will take... another five rounds or so of this.... that would be about another 380 days from now... a little over a year. As I have mentioned many times, "normal" is my goal, and to abstain from things that normal people eat for a year and a quarter is not normal; it has already caused a lot of anxiety, and it should not have to.
I am also concerned about the complexity of the diet, and the need for "medical food", which is really expensive. I will literally have to construct what I can and cannot eat every day. I have been using SparkPeople to figure out how to manage this complicated diet.
Another thing is that you cannot throw out your kitchen and suddenly eat the way you diet; the diet needs to fit how you already eat or else you will not follow it. I have grouped foods that our family normally eats, and have been fitting meals into the diet. Build-A-Nacho is very popular around our house, but it takes up over three quarters of my day's allowances, so I will have to mostly starve to have it.
If you are considering doing this, be prepared to spend a lot of money on stuff you need. You need over three pounds of protein a week, vegetables and fruits, which are also expensive, the no-calorie salad dressing that has saved my life is $5.00 for two to three days perhaps, and I should buy stock in Traditional Medicinals because I drink their tea (because I hate water), and that is a ton of money too. I have been very weak, so I have also spent easily over $100.00 on B-12, stuff for constipation, stuff to give me more energy, stuff to help my adrenals, etc. I feel very guilty when I see my husband eating spaghetti every day and my kids eating sandwiches every day to fund this.
Sunday, July 3, 2011
HCG 36
The home stretch is feeling like exactly that... I have been craving stuff, not because I am hungry, but because I have been exposed to a lot of food lately. Yesterday had me in tears; my family got together, so there was hot dogs, sandwiches, chips and dip, and the desserts were about twelve boxes of different possibilities. I had to go and hide to avoid it all. At home, food is pretty strictly monitored so I know what troublesome food darkens my door and I am braced for the smell of it.
On the bright side, I am still losing weight... as of yesterday, I am 306 pounds, measurements 40.0, 45.25 and 62.0.
I am very worried about phase two of the diet because it seems that I will not have an opportunity to eat "normal". That is causing massive stress...
On the bright side, I am still losing weight... as of yesterday, I am 306 pounds, measurements 40.0, 45.25 and 62.0.
I am very worried about phase two of the diet because it seems that I will not have an opportunity to eat "normal". That is causing massive stress...
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